Curious to get some advice on what everyone thinks the best path forward is for me and my family. Not sure if this is best forum for it but figured I'd start here due to it being financially centered.
Background: Wife is only child and wife's dad died ~15 years ago and left mother-in-law in poor financial health. MIL worked multiple jobs to put my wife through A&M and rose up to director level in a company and was doing very well for herself; however, she quit her job on a whim due to that company being bought out and conflicts with new leadership team without any plan whatsoever. This was about 3.5 years ago and she struggled to find anything for 8+ months (running through all of her savings as well as money we loaned her to keep renting the house she was in and cover basic necessities). She eventually landed a new job working remote and things were looking up, but that company laid her off after a couple of months and she was again back in the same situation (loaning money to help cover basics). When it came time to renew the lease for her house, we had a hard conversation and said she either moves in with us and we can help or she's on her own (we had our first kid on the way and could not keep giving money to help her stay afloat). She struggled to find anything for another couple of months and ended up taking an office manager position making ~$25/hr. Our agreement was that if she moved in, we would pay for food/housing/utilities and she would focus on paying off her car loan, credit cards, and build back up a savings. This is the current situation we are in now but honestly have no idea where she stands on her debts.
Current: I truly love my MIL and she has been amazing helping with the kid/cooking/ doing chores around the house. My wife thinks the best path forward is for her to stay with us for the foreseeable future if not forever; however, wife and I are now expecting our second child and I'm starting to stress the living situation. We have a 3/2 house and will need both bedrooms once the new baby is here (baby 2 due January 2026, probably need room in June 2026). House is on 4 acres so we have options but am trying to figure out the best financial path for my family. The options I have so far:
1.) Sell house and find/build house that has more room. While I would love to build, we were extremely lucky to buy in early 2020 and are at 3.5% APR on our house (bought at 250K and could easily sell now around 600k+). Location and schools are great but land/houses big enough for our situation are going for 650k+ with today's ~7%= APR's to bat. Hard pill to swallow on that one.
2.) Enclose garage and build into MIL-suite. Rough estimate of 30k-50k. Like having a garage for wife's vehicle and storage but would probably be easiest as it already has 3 walls and foundation plus drywall.
3.) Build ADU/detached MIL-suite. Rough estimate of 40k-60k self-performing a lot of it. Would need to figure out plumbing mostly as spot would be lower than current septic system.
4.) Build out shed. Have a 30x40 shed on the property that has water and electric to it but no plumbing. Build out would be 30k-50k. Self-perform most but again, big issue is plumbing.
5.) Buy "rental" house and "rent" to MIL. 200k-250k. While this is most expensive, my thought is the possible return for long term view, but also biggest risk. If we can get small 3/2 house in subdivision close to us, she can have her own space but also help us build long term investment. Risk is if she gets laid off/fired/can't pay
rent, we're stuck back in the same situation again with a second mortgage and nowhere in our house for her to move into.
I'm starting to feel the pressure and am wanting to narrow down options prior to doing anymore research/loan funding. Main question is which one helps us long term financially? Which option can help us regardless of the situation we're in so that we can use this to help in future ROI? Also would like the consensus on what this financially looks for regarding MIL. Should I expect her to put up money for this (which she doesn't have) or am I the one who's going to have to cover it all. Any and all advice is appreciated.
TLDR: Wifes mother is going to be with us probably till the end, little to no help financially, need best recommendation on financial path forward due to current house being full. Options 1-5 are my ponderings on path forward.
Background: Wife is only child and wife's dad died ~15 years ago and left mother-in-law in poor financial health. MIL worked multiple jobs to put my wife through A&M and rose up to director level in a company and was doing very well for herself; however, she quit her job on a whim due to that company being bought out and conflicts with new leadership team without any plan whatsoever. This was about 3.5 years ago and she struggled to find anything for 8+ months (running through all of her savings as well as money we loaned her to keep renting the house she was in and cover basic necessities). She eventually landed a new job working remote and things were looking up, but that company laid her off after a couple of months and she was again back in the same situation (loaning money to help cover basics). When it came time to renew the lease for her house, we had a hard conversation and said she either moves in with us and we can help or she's on her own (we had our first kid on the way and could not keep giving money to help her stay afloat). She struggled to find anything for another couple of months and ended up taking an office manager position making ~$25/hr. Our agreement was that if she moved in, we would pay for food/housing/utilities and she would focus on paying off her car loan, credit cards, and build back up a savings. This is the current situation we are in now but honestly have no idea where she stands on her debts.
Current: I truly love my MIL and she has been amazing helping with the kid/cooking/ doing chores around the house. My wife thinks the best path forward is for her to stay with us for the foreseeable future if not forever; however, wife and I are now expecting our second child and I'm starting to stress the living situation. We have a 3/2 house and will need both bedrooms once the new baby is here (baby 2 due January 2026, probably need room in June 2026). House is on 4 acres so we have options but am trying to figure out the best financial path for my family. The options I have so far:
1.) Sell house and find/build house that has more room. While I would love to build, we were extremely lucky to buy in early 2020 and are at 3.5% APR on our house (bought at 250K and could easily sell now around 600k+). Location and schools are great but land/houses big enough for our situation are going for 650k+ with today's ~7%= APR's to bat. Hard pill to swallow on that one.
2.) Enclose garage and build into MIL-suite. Rough estimate of 30k-50k. Like having a garage for wife's vehicle and storage but would probably be easiest as it already has 3 walls and foundation plus drywall.
3.) Build ADU/detached MIL-suite. Rough estimate of 40k-60k self-performing a lot of it. Would need to figure out plumbing mostly as spot would be lower than current septic system.
4.) Build out shed. Have a 30x40 shed on the property that has water and electric to it but no plumbing. Build out would be 30k-50k. Self-perform most but again, big issue is plumbing.
5.) Buy "rental" house and "rent" to MIL. 200k-250k. While this is most expensive, my thought is the possible return for long term view, but also biggest risk. If we can get small 3/2 house in subdivision close to us, she can have her own space but also help us build long term investment. Risk is if she gets laid off/fired/can't pay
rent, we're stuck back in the same situation again with a second mortgage and nowhere in our house for her to move into.
I'm starting to feel the pressure and am wanting to narrow down options prior to doing anymore research/loan funding. Main question is which one helps us long term financially? Which option can help us regardless of the situation we're in so that we can use this to help in future ROI? Also would like the consensus on what this financially looks for regarding MIL. Should I expect her to put up money for this (which she doesn't have) or am I the one who's going to have to cover it all. Any and all advice is appreciated.
TLDR: Wifes mother is going to be with us probably till the end, little to no help financially, need best recommendation on financial path forward due to current house being full. Options 1-5 are my ponderings on path forward.