what about becoming an adult caught you completely off guard?
what about becoming an adult caught you completely off guard?
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Last: 15 days ago by IIIHorn
Losing a parent. No matter how much you prepare, you are never prepared. Cherish every moment.
How little I actually knew. I didn't realize how much my parents were winging it when I was a kid.
First thing I remember being shocked by was that I had a salaried job and was expected to work outside of 8 to 5 M-F. I'd always been paid by the hour. It was a whole new way of thinking.
butt sechs
Going to the grocery store and learning the difference between real food and the poor people food I was used to.
How friggin right my parents were about dang near everything!
Careers are a zero sum game. No matter how many promotions, never truly "happy" with work and you're giving up something for what you're getting in return.
This has greatly changed my perspective on where to prioritize time and focus more on relationships, whereas I used to be laser-focused on career for essentially all of my 20s and early 30s.
This has greatly changed my perspective on where to prioritize time and focus more on relationships, whereas I used to be laser-focused on career for essentially all of my 20s and early 30s.
It didn't hit me immediately. Right after high school, I took semi-retirement, only working part time, going to junior college part time. I saw no reason to go all in. That went on for five years, then I followed my girlfriend (now wife) up to Aggieland. After A&M, we got married and it was a surprise to me how much it took to get by in life. Being a bum was cheap living, but trying to have nicer things required a full time income, or two. I had always paid most of my expenses even during high school, but had no concept of rent, utilities, insurance, food, etc. that my parents had been providing.
How many people in leadership positions are incompetent at everything but blaming their failures on others and taking credit for work other people do. Working your butt off and doing good work isn't enough. You have to be a slobbering suck-up and pretend to care about certain people (aka 'network') to get ahead.
The impact of social media.
How few people of all ages ever learned the definition of "responsibility".
Music peaked when I was in high school and a complete drop-off after I graduated from TAMC.
How real the opening scene of Office Space really is.
Music peaked when I was in high school and a complete drop-off after I graduated from TAMC.
How real the opening scene of Office Space really is.
Anchorhold said:
How few people of all ages ever learned the definition of "responsibility".
Music peaked when I was in high school and a complete drop-off after I graduated from TAMC.
How real the opening scene of Office Space really is.
TAMC?
Yeah, I guess going from crooner music and Elvis to The Doors and Hendrix was quite a change.
Just how expensive everything is. If you want to go to the store to buy something, you need to have a car, and gas, and insurance, and money to actually buy the product from the store. Stuff you take for granted as a kid that your parents bought you now you have to take care of: toothpaste, toilet paper, cell phone bill, health insurance etc.
dabo man said:
First thing I remember being shocked by was that I had a salaried job and was expected to work outside of 8 to 5 M-F. I'd always been paid by the hour. It was a whole new way of thinking.
This! I hadn't been working at my company for about 3 months right out of college, and we went to a mandatory 50 hour week with overtime. I thought great I'm getting 10 hours at time and half!!! That first check came and it wasn't right, to me. I took it all the way up through my department, and to the VP of HR and Finance. That's when i learned what an Exempt Employee was, and that I was one of them!
Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy
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Dat da man really be stickin it to us.
Once you have a family you'll basically worry about something every day for the rest of your life, and most of that worry is not about yourself. You'll worry about your children, your wife, your parents, your friends, and sometimes your coworkers. You'll worry about something or someone almost every day, weekends, holidays. I don't recall having a constant sense of worry before others had to depend on me when I only had to take care of myself from day to day. Once others rely on you it's a different world, basically overnight. You'll stop worrying about trivial stuff, only the big stuff is on your radar.
I learned how important having kids is for me.
If I could go back i would have twice as many!
If I could go back i would have twice as many!
And how everything, everywhere is designed to separate you from your money. That's what hit me. Everything is designed to take from you. It's wild.
evestor1 said:
I learned how important having kids is for me.
If I could go back i would have twice as many!
You still can.
The AntAGonist said:
And how everything, everywhere is designed to separate you from your money. That's what hit me. Everything is designed to take from you. It's wild.
Agreed. I remember seeing Kevin O Leary from Shark Tank say something like this. As soon as you leave your home for the day, everyone is trying to take money from your pockets and put it in their pockets. Its up to us to keep as much money in our pockets as possible.
Max Power said:
Once you have a family you'll basically worry about something every day for the rest of your life, and most of that worry is not about yourself. You'll worry about your children, your wife, your parents, your friends, and sometimes your coworkers. You'll worry about something or someone almost every day, weekends, holidays. I don't recall having a constant sense of worry before others had to depend on me when I only had to take care of myself from day to day. Once others rely on you it's a different world, basically overnight. You'll stop worrying about trivial stuff, only the big stuff is on your radar.
Great post and this is definitely me as well.
As a kid I remember being jealous of my mom b/c when she got home from work she was "done" for the day. Meanwhile, when I got home from school I still had to keep doing schoolwork into the evening. haha. idiot.
Until I owned a home I never fully realized how much of a scam property taxes and public school funding is. And that no matter how long I live I will never actually own my home.
Until I owned a home I never fully realized how much of a scam property taxes and public school funding is. And that no matter how long I live I will never actually own my home.
Buying insurance, managing investments, honebuying process. Im convinced 99% of the people who speak knowledgeable on these topics heard something and repeat it without ever checking to see if it was right.
Max Power said:
Once you have a family you'll basically worry about something every day for the rest of your life, and most of that worry is not about yourself. You'll worry about your children, your wife, your parents, your friends, and sometimes your coworkers. You'll worry about something or someone almost every day, weekends, holidays. I don't recall having a constant sense of worry before others had to depend on me when I only had to take care of myself from day to day. Once others rely on you it's a different world, basically overnight. You'll stop worrying about trivial stuff, only the big stuff is on your radar.
Man is this truth.
It wasn't until my late 20s that this really set in. Before then, I never worried about things even several years into my career.
Max Power said:
Once you have a family you'll basically worry about something every day for the rest of your life, and most of that worry is not about yourself. You'll worry about your children, your wife, your parents, your friends, and sometimes your coworkers. You'll worry about something or someone almost every day, weekends, holidays. I don't recall having a constant sense of worry before others had to depend on me when I only had to take care of myself from day to day. Once others rely on you it's a different world, basically overnight. You'll stop worrying about trivial stuff, only the big stuff is on your radar.
Well said.
Well, I'm here to tell you now each and every mother's son
You better learn it fast, you better learn it young
'Cause someday never comes
You better learn it fast, you better learn it young
'Cause someday never comes
I always thought there would be a moment where I felt "grown up". Not really sure if I thought that would be an overnight thing or I'd grow into it but I'm still just me trying to figure stuff out as I go along. No real "I'm an adult" moment, just trying to do less stupid stuff day to day.
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The weekends still go by fast.
Now the weeks fly by too.
Now the weeks fly by too.
Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy said:
The weekends still go by fast.
Now the weeks fly by too.
That reminds me. No one fully explained just how fast time goes by as an adult. I remember sitting in the classroom staring at the clock, waiting for 3:00pm. Monday to Friday was an eternity.
That's because our perception of time is logarithmic. When you were 5 a year was a fifth of your life. Now it feels like a year was last week sometime.NoahAg said:Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy said:
The weekends still go by fast.
Now the weeks fly by too.
That reminds me. No one fully explained just how fast time goes by as an adult. I remember sitting in the classroom staring at the clock, waiting for 3:00pm. Monday to Friday was an eternity.
For me, it was the understanding of the dependency and connection between decisions. Big things like where to live, what job to take, who to marry, sure, but also the seemingly small things that eventually contribute rather significantly to the big things.
My younger days feel like a series of discrete decisions that were largely one and done. If something worked or was good, then great. If it didn't work or turned out not for the best, say oh well and move on. Now, it feels like decisions are never discrete and always impact one, two, or more proverbial steps down the road.
It is honestly a bit paralyzing at times and can suck the joy out of things, and I probably let the pendulum swing too far toward the analysis and projection side of things now. That is of course balanced with the fact that realizing decisions are not discrete and have more impact than I used to realize is really helpful in many contexts.
My younger days feel like a series of discrete decisions that were largely one and done. If something worked or was good, then great. If it didn't work or turned out not for the best, say oh well and move on. Now, it feels like decisions are never discrete and always impact one, two, or more proverbial steps down the road.
It is honestly a bit paralyzing at times and can suck the joy out of things, and I probably let the pendulum swing too far toward the analysis and projection side of things now. That is of course balanced with the fact that realizing decisions are not discrete and have more impact than I used to realize is really helpful in many contexts.
Only when I got much older:
1. Time flies
2. Relationships count so much and long ones are special
3. Life is expensive. Pay yourself and live way below your means.
4. If your marriage is coasting you are probably going downhill. Guard your marriage consistently and learn how to fight fair.
5. To repeat, life is short.
1. Time flies
2. Relationships count so much and long ones are special
3. Life is expensive. Pay yourself and live way below your means.
4. If your marriage is coasting you are probably going downhill. Guard your marriage consistently and learn how to fight fair.
5. To repeat, life is short.
That loneliness gets much harder to do something about once you get farther into adulthood and your friends pair off and keep getting married.
Keeping up with work, the house, cooking, cleaning, dogs and kids is a lot harder than I thought, but in the end you sort of find your way through it
Keeping up with work, the house, cooking, cleaning, dogs and kids is a lot harder than I thought, but in the end you sort of find your way through it
average_joker said:That's because our perception of time is logarithmic. When you were 5 a year was a fifth of your life. Now it feels like a year was last week sometime.NoahAg said:Mr. Thunderclap McGirthy said:
The weekends still go by fast.
Now the weeks fly by too.
That reminds me. No one fully explained just how fast time goes by as an adult. I remember sitting in the classroom staring at the clock, waiting for 3:00pm. Monday to Friday was an eternity.
Exactly. I've explained this concept to my kids. Hopefully they take it to heart.
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